This year, no resolutions. But as I've mentioned, I am focusing more on myself. So this morning, I went to a yoga class. I took a couple classes in college and I have a few DVDs I like, but I haven't ever taken a scheduled, weekly class. I haven't really practiced at all since Audrey was born.
Have I mentioned I'm an introvert? I like stability and routine. I don't like the unknown of trying new things, especially by myself. But I got up this morning, put on my big girl panties, and went to this class all by myself.
And it was great. There were actually quite a few people there and I felt awkward at first. But I tried to remind myself to stay in the moment, to take this time to focus on myself. Not the people I love, not the strangers in the room, just me.
Our teacher started the class by asking us to think about any intentions we may have. I immediately started thinking about other people in my life, but then I caught myself. My yoga practice is going to be solely about me and my health and well-being. I almost started to cry right then and there. After a moment, she asked us to now leave our intentions behind and focus on our breath.
I was actually quite relieved to find that as the class progressed, I felt it all coming back to me. My focus inward wasn't quite what it once was, but I know that will come back to me with time and practice. She closed the class by thanking us for practicing yoga with her, and acknowledging the light within us all that we had just rejuvenated and now had to share with others.
And there it is. That is exactly my intention for myself for 2013, to rejuvenate and ignite that light within me. And I feel more confident about that intention now than when I committed to it. I feel like this class and this teacher will bring me back to yoga, and that my practice of yoga will be the thing that guides me through this year and brings me back to myself.
And now I'm actually looking forward to taking this hour and a half to myself every week. I was worried about the money, but I never spend any money on myself, ever. I am going to be out of town next weekend, but the Sunday after that I am going to buy myself a 10 session pass to the studio and go every Sunday.
The stretching felt great. I felt weak, but I look forward to the strength and muscle tone I will build over time. But most of all, I look forward to the time to relax, regroup, focus on myself and just breathe.